Towards the end of my bachelors program I participated in a volunteer position with the Counseling and Psychological Services department at Sonoma State University as a Mental Health Ambassador.
As our final project for the semester, each ambassador planned and implemented an original mental health related event/survey, or in my case, a booklet, on campus in order to provide an inclusive resource for Sonoma State students.
I had to modify my original plan, but in the end I was proud of what I had produced. My project consisted of an unconventional pamphlet of sorts that was displayed in the Psychology Services office where students were able to attend therapeutic sessions. My pamphlet was titled, Survivors’ Self-Care Kit, my slogan being, “because you matter”.
My main intention for this booklet was to provide sexual assault/harassment survivors with an easily accessible, kind, and inclusive resource for taking care of their mental health.
Note: I will be writing further articles on the impact of sexual assault, but for now I will provide a brief overview of the contents of my ambassador project and use this as an example for general self-care.
The booklet was thin but filled with a variety of resources revolving around the idea of creating oneself a travel self-care kit. If I had had the budget I would have done this through a workshop, but that vision will have to wait for now. Instead, I condensed my workshop idea into a handheld visual. Inside this visual I put a how-to-build guide on care kits including affirmations to cut out, coloring pages, and an example page of what can go inside a self-care kit for maximized impact.
Note: You can find some of the booklet contents in the tips and tricks collection at the bottom of this article. Give it a try and see what works for you!
Self-care isn’t easy, though the idea seems simple. Practicing loving oneself not only mentally but physically requires quite a bit of effort. Somedays this effort is inspired and other days just getting out of bed is considered self-care. I wrote my booklet to help people take that first step towards finding their healthy, happy place. My booklet may not be very complicated, but self-care doesn’t need to be either….if only I would follow my own advice!
Though my aim was to help others, creating this booklet helped me to realize truths about myself, and the importance of forgiveness as a means of self-care.
Self-care, for me at least, should be about empowerment, providing myself with what I deserve, and appreciating the beauty of who I am. But what exactly do I deserve? And what is there to appreciate about myself? Well, if I take a deep breath and forgive myself for being a bully to myself, lots of things.
More often than not I berate myself for this however. I fall into a vortex of anxious thoughts:
“I don’t deserve anything.”
“There’s more to hate about myself than love.”
“I’m pathetic and should suffer for being so weak and self-pitying.”
And, unfortunately, so on.
These thoughts stem from my insecurities and the desire to be perfect, and no matter how many times I tell myself that “I am perfect just the way I am”, I continue to struggle to really believe in that phrase. With my whole heart I trust that this is true for others, that other people are perfect just the way they are because they simply are, there’s no other answer. For some twisted reason, however, I have convinced myself that I don’t deserve this kind of understanding in return.
This is why self-care is so important, and why trying again and again to create healthy habits is crucial to understanding and loving oneself.
Like I mentioned before, self-care is not an easy process. Much like other habits, this one requires patience and perseverance. Creating a natural-feeling and consistent self-care routine takes time and lots of trial and error. Even so, the results are worth the efforts.
You are worth the effort.
Without self-care ones mental health can spiral drastically, and this can lead to harmful actions and habits that become debilitating and affects ones life in a multitude of ways. So let’s find our self-care routines and begin healing and sustaining healthy mental mindsets.
Self-care time should be all the time, but in today’s busy and confusing world that can feel impossible. Self-care often gets shelved until one is forced to attempt such a thing post breakdown. No more is that an option.
Self-care is now a requirement for you. Self-care is now not an option. Just like working, eating, and breathing, self-care is now a necessity in your life. You no longer need to feel guilty for taking the time to discover yourself and for the care you require.
Let’s take the first step together by trying out some of the methods below!
Note: The following tips and tricks are compiled from personal experience and research. Each of these, generally, require trial and error in order to find what works for each individual person and what doesn’t. Not all of the suggestions below will work for you, but remember, these are not the only options available.
Allow yourself to have fun with these and let me know in the comments how these work for you!!
Tips & Tricks
- Travel self-care kit – taken directly from Survivors Self-Care Kit by Shelby Salerno
“Take the time to provide yourself with a validating, safe, and reliable resource you can refer to over and over again because you matter, and you deserve to be happy too.
But How?
How can I start such a potentially daunting task?
Step 1: Find Your “Home”
Whether it is a shoebox, a binder, a poster, a bag, or whatever you can think of that is comfortable and accessible, establish a physical “home” for your self-care kit to live in
Step 2: Establish Why
Without a reason why you are doing this, this project may feel useless. Ask yourself why you are doing this, why are you making this for yourself? EX: Because I deserve this, because I am strong, because I seek to heal
Step 3: Gather the Goods
This is the fun part! Decorate, collect, create, and fill your kit with everything you need. Do it all at once or in pieces, take minutes or years, put everything or only a few things in it
Step 4: Give it a Try
Now let yourself experience your creation. Whether for two minutes or an hour, embrace the feelings that come with each item in the kit and allow yourself to heal and exist as the wonderful self you are
☺ Now give these steps a try and see what beautiful thing happens”
- Posters
Dream/Vision boards = create a simple and decorative visual for your dreams/goals. Try your best to avoid anything too complicated or cluttered because this could lead to overwhelm. Instead, post things such as photographs of your visions, sticky notes, motivational quotes, idols, etc.
Things That Make Me Happy posters = photographs of family/favorite locations, stickers, sheet music, lyrics to your favorite song, art, etc.
Dailey Reminders = create a colorful and crafty list of affirmations to tape up beside your mirror so that you can read them in the morning before you start your day, or perhaps read them when you’re feeling particularly down, anxious, or self-conscious
- Daily Affirmations (Some examples)
I am in control.
I am upset and that’s okay.
I am beautiful.
I do not need to “get over it”. I can take as much time as I need to heal.
I am the owner of my body. I am the decider of its fate.
I am not tarnished, broken, or crazy. I am growing, learning, and existing.
My being here helps others.
You are loved. You are supported. You are wanted.
You are kind. You are beautiful. You are strong.
You deserve to take care of yourself. Your mental health is just as important as anyone else’s.
You are capable.
You do not need to prove that your experience is real, because it is real.
- Mindfulness and Meditation Practices – taken directly from Survivors Self-Care Kit by Shelby Salerno
“A. Calming Techniques
a. Meditation – Space for deep breathing & existing
b. Happiness Hour – Do something that makes you happy
c. Stretch & Reflect – Yoga like poses with validation
d. Write your story – Write and write and write it out
B. Self-Care Check List
1. Physical Care
a. Eat regularly___
b. Get regular medical care___
c. Take time off when sick___
d. Do some fun physical activity___
e. Dance, stretch, yoga, tai chi___
f. Think positive body thoughts___
g. Sleep!___
2. Psychological Care
a. Take technology/social media breaks___
b. Read something unrelated to work/school___
c. Try something new___
d. Engage my intelligence in a new way/area___
e. Self-reflect___
f. Say no to extra responsibilities, make space for down time___
g. Notice thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, feelings___
3. Emotional Care
a. Spend time with people who affirm my whole self_
b. Re-re/watch favorite books and movies___
c. Find a safe place, activity___
d. Find healthy ways to express anger/frustration__
e. Express myself creatively___
f. Allow myself to cry___
g. Share my feelings without shame___”
Further Resources
AMERICAN
The following links has access to a variety of mental health resources in the U.S –>
BRITISH
The following links has access to a variety of mental health resources in the United Kingdom –>
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/mental-health-helplines/
https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/our-work
OTHER BLOGS
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/your-stories/
https://www.mqmentalhealth.org
https://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com
Thank you for your strength, your beauty, and your courage.
You inspire me to keep moving forward and to heal more each day.
Thank you for being you.
